Dec 08 2009
Just don’t do it
Pre-Ramble: So, who would you rather be — Tiger Woods or the person who attempted to throw a tomato at Sarah Palin during a book signing appearance yesterday at the Mall of America — but hit a policeman instead?
The tomato missed Ms. Palin by about 10 feet, and instead splattered the Bloomington police commander in charge of the security detail. Another officer was also struck by pulp.”
Wow, that’s a super tough choice. Sure, Tiger is still one of the best athletes in the world and has billions of dollars, but none of that is going to make a decent marinara sauce.
I promised myself I wouldn’t write about Tiger Woods’ recent incident, but that was before the Pre-Scandal Tiger (PST) started to appear — everywhere. Like the furry orange creatures in a PGA version of Hammer the Hedgehog, Tiger’s sorry mug just keeps popping up.
To add insult to irony, it’s usually accompanied by some noble tagline, like the latest Swiss avant-garde watchmaker Tag Heuer advertising series that features stunning black and white portraits of Tiger and asks, “What are you made of?” Apparently, Tiger is made of something less praiseworthy than his Official Partner signed up for.
In 2004, Forbes Magazine proclaimed Nike’s contract with Woods as one of the most shrewd in marketing history …
It’s no secret that Tiger Woods is a marketer’s dream. No company has capitalized on the appeal of the good-looking, clean-cut, articulate, scandal-free golf whiz more than Nike … “
It’s probably no secret that Tiger’s rapid decomposition is causing marketing teams around the globe to call out the Haz-Mat squads and could potentially make Nike one of the most screwed in marketing history. According to Nielsen, marketers have pulled ALL ads featuring TW from prime-time television network and cable channel broadcasts.
If only the print media could follow suit. The January 2010 cover of Golf Digest sports a Norman Rockwell-esque photo of TW lining up a putt with President Obama. The accompanying article is just painful to read … with subheads like, … “sharing a personal moment,” … “the art of grace,” … “at least look like you’re having fun,”… and “save some for the losers.” According to the article,
What makes Tiger Woods the most dominant athlete in the world isn’t so much his golf swing as what he does between swings.”
Ok then.
The Take-Away: FORE!! … … Sadly, this one’s headed for the deep rough (and it’s going to take more than a 7-iron to punch it back onto the fairway).
I just keep waiting for more sex kittens to be ushered out of Tiger’s lair. He might as well open the whole treasure chest of secrets because there is probably more of them. If you see one there are bound to be more… they say that about roaches and rats, you know! BLECH!