Turtleneck strongly suggested

Posted by on Oct 31, 2011 in commentary, just for fun, style | No Comments

Pre-Ramble:  Every year about this time, I steel myself against the inevitable flack I must endure on behalf of my beloved wardrobe workhorse — the turtleneck.

This year, the first shot was fired across the bow by none other than Clinton Kelly, the other half of the “Clinton and Stacy” duo from the popular show on TLC “What Not To Wear.”

In case you aren’t a fan, or don’t have daughters who threaten to submit your pathetic profile to the show on a regular basis, “What Not To Wear” takes some poor, unsuspecting slob; throws out all of her horrible, ill-fitting clothes; and releases her onto the streets of Madison Avenue with nothing but a few fashion tips and a loaded credit card. The fashionista-in-training invariably comes back with bags of new horrible, ill-fitting clothes and eventually Clinton and Stacy are compelled to take her out and dress her up in stuff that is flattering, stylish and suited to a new fashionable lifestyle.

Well, so, apparently, Clinton is teaming up with a local alterations chain to bring his fashion-guru-ness to our own Minnesota Mecca of Americana — the Mall of America. Based on the premise that “the essence of style is fit,” “Perfect Fit by Clinton Kelly” tailoring, alterations and style consultation service will debut in the Mall this weekend.

Frankly, he couldn’t have chosen a better venue; the MOA is host to all ilk of fashion violations, at all levels of the fashion spectrum.  However, given this missive around turtlenecks, it is clear that pretty-boy Clinton (he is pretty cute), has NEVER set foot in Minnesota in the winter.  In an interview to promote the “Perfect Fit” opening, Clinton gives the following “haute tip for surviving a Minnesota winter” …

“Beware of the turtleneck … Don’t get me wrong, a turtleneck can be a wonderful thing, and I have a few of them myself … But they should be saved for a really cold day when you’re skiing or spending time outside.”

Seriously?! …  “Saved for a really cold day” … ??  You mean like, EVERY DAY FOR FIVE MONTHS STRAIGHT??

The Take-Away:  Clinton, baby, It’s COLD outside” — !  See below for What To Wear in from the MOA parking lot.  (Turtleneck strongly suggested.)

Leave a Reply