Pre-Ramble:  In another place in time that missive might have been directed at a carefree young child while strolling through a sunny pond-side park somewhere.  But actually, it was me chastising myself for kicking what I realized too late was not a small round rock in the center of our driveway.

Crap. Literally. All over the toe of my favorite Donald Pliner black microfiber wedge. Ordinarily, I would have been way more enraged by this … (I have a hot streak that doesn’t suffer foibles lightly), but I was far too distracted by a rabbit hole to engage with the goose poop in any meaningful way.

What started this jag is what always happens … I read a dangerously interesting article in one of my known vices – the NY Times, WSJ, Vanity Fair or a random snippet in the margins of some newsfeed, and before you know it, I’m careening down a slippery slope of anxiety-fed adrenalin.

It happens in bookstores too.  Surrounded by all of those thought-provoking perspectives and images, … it’s like I just want to HAVE IT ALL, … instantaneously, … in my head to keep and use and know.  And yet, at that exact moment, the idea of actually reading any of it is overwhelmingly exhausting.

Well, so, anyway, today I was working through a stack of newspapers when I came across a story about mommy-bloggers.  You know, those newly minted stay-at-home mothers who have so much frantically idling intellect that they sit in their kitchens, children at their feet, singlehandedly spinning day-to-day experiences into a living and breathing online entity. Turns out there are a whole bunch of them out there — it’s a virtual community. 

While I might spoof on these women at times, the truth is, I am secretly envious of them.  I covet the opportunity that they have to observe, ponder and preserve that particular time in their lives, both for themselves and for their children. I also covet the cutting-edge legitimacy that they have established for themselves, a place where they can actively participate in a greater social context while still standing front and center to raise their children. They get to publically indulge and leverage the motherhood experience in a way that was never available to my generation of moms … (or if it was, I was never aware of it).

Unlike many in my generation, these gals don’t appear to be conflicted about their stay-at-home status in the least. In fact, they’re in your face with it.  Beyond a quick soccer-mom chat over the back fence, mommy-bloggers are able to reach out and exchange their thoughts and ideas with people all over the world. Theirs is a unique and global clique built around the shared experiences of sleepless nights, strained organic peaches, and favorite plug-ins. They have catchy taglines and logos, … elaborate mastheads and Fan Pages, … they use cool Twitter-speak and worship their webmasters, … They are simultaneously “out there in it” AND at home doing the warm-cookies-and-milk-after-school thing. It’s awesome.

The Take-Away: Alas, have I come to the party too late?  My fabulous children are grown and nearly gone.  All of those cherished child-rearing moments have gone by — un-blogged.  … While I am no longer compelled to cry over spilled milk, I can still raise a sippy cup to the awesome mommy-bloggers out there and let them know that if they need any child-rearing advice, (… “Don’t kick goose poop in your good shoes …” ), I hope they know where they can find me.

Pre-Ramble:  Hi, it’s me, Daisy – I’ll be your esteemed guest-blogger for today.  Actually, Mom begged me to write the blog because she was all in a panic since it was Monday morning and the blog muse hadn’t kicked in yet. I could tell by the way she was whining and clawing at the refrigerator that things were going to be coming my way. (She always sticks me with the blog when she doesn’t know what to write about.)

To make matters worse, she had just read an article in the New York Times Sunday Magazine (“Say What?” by Rob Walker, 5/31/09, p. 30) about the plethora of opportunities and technological tools available to the individual for expressing themselves to a World-Wide-audience.  The article also eluded to the associated expectation that bloggers will not only have something to say, but that it will be interesting, entertaining and meaningful, and that fresh insights will be shared with alarming frequency. 

… blogs have evolved from something to be updated on occasion to being updated daily, then many times a day, and now social media invites updates hourly, or constantly.” 

No pressure there.

Apparently, a site called “plinky.com” (sounds like a good name for those useless accessory-dogs that fit in purses) generates a daily blog-worthy inquiry; something to spur pithy thoughts, like, “What top five songs should you take on a road trip?” … “Which movie characters would you befriend in real life?” … “Who would win a fight between a bear and a shark?” … or, “What’s the most useless thing in your house right now?”  While those topics are very nice … none of them really speaks to me or the doggie demographic. What about, “List your top 5 puppy names” … “How to win friends and solicit table scraps?” … “Which movie characters would you bite in real life?” … or, “How many ways are there to actually skin a cat?”

The great thing about being a dog is that there is no imperative to be witty. In fact, speaking of speaking, unless someone issues the “Speak!” command, or errant wildlife violates the perimeter, a dog can pretty much keep quiet.  And, while you may be called upon to fetch something or perform an occasional trick, these feats are usually basic and nonverbal. Instead of feeling compelled to yammer on and on on our Facebook page all day, we dogs are inclined – and expected – to sleep. If there’s a sunny patch of carpet and I’m not lying in it, people think there’s something wrong with me.

The Take-Away: Bloggers everywhere should just take a load off. If there’s something compelling to say — say it.  If not — go roll around in the backyard. 

Post Note: Mom wanted me to report out on the bird nest … she wanted me to mention that the Chiplets are getting bigger and featherier, and that the nest was getting really crowded.  Give me a packet of dipping sauce and I can take care of that in 20 seconds.